Balance Inside the Bubble: 5 Tips to Transform Your Work-From-Home Experience

Creating whole-person balance for the modern day work-from-homers

Working for yourself from home or even working for a company virtually has many benefits… more freedom, flexibility and of course, working from a more comfortable and casual environment (even in fuzzy slippers!).

But what about the down side? Time management challenges, bleed over from work-life into personal life, isolation and work taking over EVERYTHING!

Here are some simple tips that when applied with consistency will help you THRIVE, not just survive in a balanced bubble.

Tip #1

Create a budget for your time, energy and resources. Proactive and intentional approaches to time management, money management and energy management will pay you back a thousand fold!!

Tip#2

Create work-life balance through setting healthy boundaries around your work life, work schedule and career in general (physically, mentally, emotionally & spiritually). Then it is up to you to honor those boundaries!

Tip #3

Create a separate work space – clock in and clock out. When you exit your work area leave ALL of the work behind. Do not carry it out with you (mentally, emotionally, physically or spiritually).

Tip #4

Do take a ‘lunch break’… take 45 minutes to 1 hour in the middle of the day for a little siesta! Take a walk, meditate, exercise or whatever act of self-care will replenish your mind, body, heart and spirit.

Tip #5

Connection… we all need it! Find other work-from-homers to connect with, bounce ideas off of, get (and give) support and share community with. Consider a monthly meet-up or even an online google hang out over coffee.

Give it a shot! Apply these 5 simple tips to your work-from-home life for 30 days CONSISTENTLY and see how much balance they will bring! May your work-from-home life be fruitful, joyful, impactful… and BALANCED! Enjoy your beautiful bubble!

An Eco Vacation That Will Change Your Life!

Each year I get very excited to lead the Breakthrough Wellness Retreat, An integrative life coaching experience, because each year I hear what a game changer this is for those who attend.

Many times my clients and students experience being stuck, seemingly unable to overcome certain experiences or roadblock. After years of integrative life coaching and teaching through Integrative Wellness Academy I have seen thousands of life changing breakthroughs! During the retreat, I pack together the powerful tools and techniques from over 20 different healing modalities to help people experience powerful and tangible change amidst a backdrop of tropical paradise!

What is a breakthrough wellness retreat?

The Breakthrough Wellness Retreat is a weekend-long, immersion-style, self-development retreat. The retreat applies mine and Integrative Wellness Academy’s (IWA) integrative wellness and life transformation coaching toolkit, which integrates over 20 different healing modalities. This toolkit includes Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), hypnosis, Therapeutic Yoga, life coaching, Emotional Clearing Method (ECM), Thought Pattern Management (TPM), reiki, integrative wellness & life coaching, and powerful forgiveness techniques.

I will guide you through the process of letting go of what no longer serves you, identify what limits you from your highest potential, clarify your goals and purpose, and create an action plan to achieve them! You will walk away from this retreat with a personal strategy for success and fulfillment, both personally and professionally, with a personal action plan and personal business plan that you have created during the retreat. Come rest, renew and completely transform your life!

What is integrative life coaching?

Integrative Life Coach: A coach trained in life coaching fundamentals combined with a diverse range of healing modalities in the areas of mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual wellness to make positive changes in all areas of life.

Integrative life coaching integrates numerous healing modalities to equip and empower clients to live balanced and successful lives. Integrative life coaching uses techniques, mind-body tools, and action plans to achieve permanent behavior change. During this retreat, Rachel will help you get from where you are in life to where you want to be. Rachel will coach you towards achieving mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual balance that will benefit your life long after the weekend retreat is over.

What does is mean to bring balance to all four aspects of self; mental, emotional, physical and spiritual?

I use the Holistic life model to coach you towards achieving wellness and balance in each of the four aspects of self and in each major area of life such as career, health, relationships and self-development.

Holistic Life Coaching Model

Mind

  • thought life, mental models, self perception, and mental patterns

Emotions

  • emotions and relationships with self and others

Physical

  • health or tangible things like career or finances

Spirit

  • awareness, self-discovery, connection, and  spirituality

 

What is an Integrative Life Coaching Toolbox?

Using over 20 different healing modalities, I have developed an integrative approach to life coaching that has many powerful tools and techniques to help you achieve lasting positive change.

One of the powerful tools that you will be lead through is emotional clearing.

Experience Emotional Clearing Method and gain freedom…

 

Emotional Clearing Method (ECM)

An innovative emotional healing technique for both the conscious and unconscious mind.

Emotional Clearing Method™ (ECM) is an alternative therapeutic emotional clearing technique developed by Rachel Eva, the founder of IWA. ECM is an advanced integrative life coaching technique that draws on various modalities and theories of neuroscience, mental health, life coaching, and alternative therapies, including neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), hypnosis, hypnotherapy, Mind-Body Medicine, and cognitive behavioral therapy. The foundations of ECM stem from neuroplasticity research and current research on emotions and beliefs effects and interconnection on biology.

ECM was developed after years of research and training with different modalities. It works with your brains neural pathways to release negative psychological patterns and connections to limiting beliefs and negative emotions that block many of us from moving forward in freedom. Recent medical studies have proven that these beliefs and stuck emotions, negative psychological patterns, and genetic markers influence our conscious and unconscious minds. These imprints can stem from our childhood, in utero, and even before we were born through intergenerational epigenetic inheritance.

In its simplest description, ECM combines powerful emotional healing techniques and mind-body medicine with the stimulation of neural pathways to release negative psychological patterns, attachments to negative emotions and limiting beliefs on the conscious and unconscious levels.

 

About me, the retreat leader…

Rachel Eva

Founder & Head Instructor Integrative Wellness Academy, Author, National Speaker & Integrative Life Coach

Rachel is an international speaker, IWA founder and head instructor, author, and Integrative Life Coach. As head instructor for IWA life coaching academy, Rachel teaches thousands of students each year through IWA professional and master level Integrative Life Coach certification programs.

Rachel is a self-development author and leader in the integrative wellness industry. She is a contributing writer of articles covering self-development and integrative wellness for several magazines. Rachel is certified in over 20 healing modalities that support her integrative approach to life coaching, self-development, and integrative wellness.

She is board certified through the Association for Integrative Psychology as a practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), master practitioner of NLP, practitioner of Mental Emotional Release® (MER), Certified Thought Pattern Management (TPM) Practitioner and clinical Hypnotherapist. She was also trained in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Rachel is a master trainer of Integrative Coaching and certified as a personal trainer and yoga therapist. She has received certifications in ERYT yoga, sports nutrition, and sports therapeutics.

Rachel believes that your past does not define your future and you can be empowered to live the life you desire. Her work is designed to support coaches and clients create the change they seek and the life they want!

In addition to the work and instruction described above, you will also get other wellness amenities that are standard at Playa Viva. This retreat includes:

  • Three nights eco-luxe beachfront accommodations
  • Farm-to-table, mostly organic, healthy meals (recipes personally designed by Rachel Eva and prepared for you by Playa Viva’s top health chef)
  • Daily meditation, yoga, and journal writing
  • Outdoor activities, such as walks and hiking and beach adventures

When? July 7-10, 2017

Pricing:

The cost of this breakthrough experience is priceless and dramatically less expensive than years of therapy or ongoing life coaching! Walk away with tangible positive changes.

Double occupancy: $2450

Single occupancy: $3050

Price is per person and includes retreat tuition, accommodations, all meals, non-alcoholic beverages, taxes, and roundtrip airport ground transfers (fly into Ixtapa/Zihuatanejo – ZIH). Additional charges will apply for bar drinks, smoothies, massage/spa services, gratuities and optional donation to sea turtle sanctuary. Airfare is additional and must be booked separately.

To enroll

To make a reservation, please do so directly through Integrative Wellness Academy.

If you have any questions, please call +1-818-358-3131, or email rachel@iwacoaching.com

 

 

How to Break Up with Stress

First let’s identify and understand stress and stressors a bit so that you will have a deeper understanding about where it may be creeping into your life.

First, stress has been proven to lead to physical illness, mental illness, injury, obesity and disease. In fact, stress is considering the leading cause of these! Even if you have a genetic pre-disposition towards an illness or disease, stress activates that gene. It essentially flips the light switch from the off position to the on position within our DNA. The numbers are staggering, research has shown that between 94-98% off ALL illness and disease is caused (related to?) by stress!

Stress is not just emotional. It can be mental (happening in our thought life), emotional, physical and environmental. Toxins we encounter causes stress to the immune system and our entire body functions.

So why not just remove stress from our lives? Well, in order to do this, we would have to live in a bubble and that would be stressful too! It is not the goal to completely remove all stress but to reduce stress while INCREASING OUR CAPACITY to deal with or handle stress.

Another important aspect of becoming empowered to breaking up with stress you need to consider is…

Where may I be adding to, or creating stress, in my life?

What do I gain from doing this, what do I get out of it?

Sometimes we create stress and chaos in our lives, or at the very least feed it, in order to avoid dealing with or acknowledging something we are not yet ready to face, resolve or change. It’s like creating a big loud clanking distraction that makes it almost impossible to hear or notice anything else. In order to truly break up with stress we must take ownership and accountability for the part we play in it.

So here are some simple steps to reducing stress and increasing your capacity to handle life’s stressors:

  1. Reduce Stress

Emotional Stress Reduction

First and foremost, recognizing and honoring our emotions is a critical part of emotional stress reduction. We need to both be aware of our feelings, then process and release those emotions in a healthy and balanced way versus suppressing, avoiding or ignoring them. Secondly, we need to take ownership of our emotional life. If we are experiencing negative emotions blaming others will not help. We must each find healthy ways to experience and express our emotions. No one else can make you FEEL any emotion without your permission and YOUR participation.

Reducing emotional stress is best done through aligning yourself with your values. When our job, relationships and all other aspects of our lives are aligned with our values and our true self (versus all the beliefs and thoughts of what SHOULD be) emotional stress will be significantly decreased.

Also learning healthy boundaries and how to say NO to the things that add un-necessary emotional stress to your life will set you free from an overabundance of emotional stress.

Physical Stress Reduction

Physical stress comes when we do not properly care for our bodies and our physical environment, as well as when we are exposed to toxins through the food we eat, the water we drink and the air we breathe. Obviously trying to control this by completely removing all physical stressors would create an even bigger imbalance, and more stress. Try to find ways that you can limit physical stressors. Balancing and responsibly managing finances, life tasks and even cleaning (decluttering and organizing greatly reduce physical stressors).

Another way to reduce physical stressors is by making a commitment to yourself to get enough sleep, water and healthy balanced meals in your system each day. You can reduce the toxins you ingest by drinking more filtered water, packing foods in glass versus plastic, eating foods that are fresh, made by you and include fruits, veggies, lean proteins and healthy fats and avoiding eating pre-prepared foods.

Mental Stress Reduction

Whenever I mention ‘mental’ health or ‘mental’ stress people often think I am referring to intelligence or expanding the mind. When I am speaking of mental stress, this is referring to your thought life. The thought life are the types of thoughts you think, especially the recurring ones. Are they negative, filled with fear, optimistic, pessimistic, balanced, loving or reactionary? You are in control of your mind and the thoughts that you think. I am not recommending avoiding negative thoughts, instead invite yourself to avoid getting into a relationship with negative thoughts and negative thought cycles. In order to have a relationship with someone or something you must invest time and attention to them. So don’t invest in your negative thoughts and allow them to go on and on and around and around repeatedly. Also learn how to let things go. Obsessing is not problem solving and only causes you to suffer.

Environmental Stress Reduction

Similar to some elements that I mentioned under ‘physical stress reduction’, environmental stressors can also be toxins. These can be in the air you breathe or the materials within the four walls where you live or work. Again, we cannot healthfully completely control our environment but we can choose to reduce environmental stress by intentionally increasing time in less stressful environments. Less traffic, less pollution, less toxic materials. Intentionally investing time in environments that ‘feel better’ will automatically begin reducing your exposure to environmental stress. We must learn to listen to what environments ‘feel’ good or better.

The two simplest ways to reduce your environmental stress are to increase time in nature, amongst its beauty, out in the cleaner air and to clean up the environment you are most in. Cleaning up your environment means participating in reducing your own foot print because we all are co-creating this toxicity we experience. It also means being intentional about your home and work space where ever you are able to do so in a balanced manner. Keeping your space clean, removing toxins, filtering your air, purifying your space and purchasing environmentally safe items such as non-toxic clothing and furniture will do more for reducing your environmental stress then you may ever imagine!

  1. Increase Capacity to Deal with Stress

 It is unrealistic and also not healthy to try to avoid everything stressful. This simply weakens our ability to cope with life. Just because something may feel difficult or ‘bad’ does not mean that it IS bad for you. Overcoming and dealing with life’s stressors not only strengthen our character and increase our capacity to cope with stress but it also builds our character. It helps us grow and expand into the type of person who can feel inner peace and have clarity and calmness of thought even amidst difficult challenges.

When increasing our capacity for stress, the metaphor I like to use most is; imagine that you are carrying around a glass of water that is half full. Every time you encounter stress it’s like adding another ounce of water in your glass. Now, if you don’t take frequent sips to empty the glass, eventually those little one ounce stressors will make your glass so full that the next one-ounce stressor will cause an overflow, a mess, that will pour out everywhere. If we are continually intentionally emptying the stress we are not thrown off balance when we encounter a new stress.

Here are some ways to increase your capacity to deal with stress and proactively manage the stress you already have:

Self-Care 

Self-care gives you the energy you need to handle stress. It should be approached as a non-negotiable, non-optional practice in your life. If you are too busy or overloaded for self-care I recommend that you schedule it into your daily life with the same priority you would a work meeting, family obligation or doctor’s appointment! Self-care can be anything that you find helpful, enjoyable or recharging. Here are some self-care ideas I shared in one of my recent blogs, The Self-Care Home Spa Experience

Healthy Boundaries

Healthy boundaries that are rooted in love are a game changer for the way you experience and enjoy your life, career and relationships. Boundaries are not rules you demand from others. That is called control, not a boundary. A boundary is something you personally set and you personally respect and abide by in order to honor yourself, your needs, your values and those of the people you love. You are the only person in any relationship that can honor your boundaries. It is up to you to do so and if you do not, you are not a victim of someone else, don’t place blame on them if you did not respect your own boundary.

Most of us never learned about healthy boundaries, I know I didn’t. A great resource for beginning or expanding your personal understanding and relationship to boundaries is the book ‘Boundaries’ by Townson & Cloud.

Let That Shit Go!

Why hold on to old resentments? They are only poisoning you! No one is perfect and everyone is doing the very best they can with the information and resources they have at the time. Would you be angry at a deaf person for not hearing you speak? No, of course not. Why do we get angry and hurt when people are unable to give or do something they are not capable of? This doesn’t mean we continue in toxic relationships and it doesn’t mean that it’s okay for someone to treat you poorly. Refer back to boundaries, take responsibility for how you react and respond to others behaviors that offend or harm you. You can honor yourself, remain safe and have healthy boundaries while also no longer feeling the venom of anger and resentment in your life. A wonderful and free resource for this is found on Byron Katie’s website called The Work. Spending 10 minutes completing the free downloadable form changed my life and my perspective on the most difficult relationships in my life – www.thework.com

Put On Your Big Kid Undies and Deal with It

Stop making everything such a big F-ing deal, seriously! It’s up to you what you take offense to. I choose not to take very much personally. If you are a person who is reactionary, you are simply a bomb waiting to go off…this makes you a victim of every circumstance and completely robs you of your power! It is only when I do choose to make it all about me and take offense to something that I experience stress and pain. When a situation or circumstance is less than your desired outcome or when someone says or does something you wished would have been different, more, less or better make a conscious choice to put on your big kid undies and deal with it from a peaceful, tolerant and loving place.

Practicing Preference Versus Attachment

I am very intentional about my life, my goals, my plans and the thoughts and actions I participate in. I have a specific goal or desired outcome AND I also allow for my goals and desires to show up looking a bit different. I practice preference versus attachment. My happiness and success is not contingent on things being one way, my way or what I perceive to be the right way. In that same vein I do not have unrealistic demands or expectations on how other people in this world behave, show up in the world or what beliefs their lives reflect. I honor others and experience much peace within this world of diverse beliefs and behaviors simply because my beliefs, perspectives and values are things I have a preference for versus an attachment to.

When we are attached to something it is narrow, rigid and reflects a ‘this is the only way’ attitude. This limits us versus offers expansion, growth and the potential for greater success. Practicing the art and science of living a life guided by preference versus attachment is something that takes intentional daily practice in order to master! When you practice continually you will build your ability to do this the way you strengthen a muscle by repetitive exercise. As you weave this art into the framework of your life you will see stress melt away like a glassier exposed to 100-degree weather. You will also experience a dramatic shift in your capacity to handle stressful people, places, things and situations.

Breathing Exercises & Meditation

Both breathing exercises (deep, relaxed intentionally focused breathing) as well as meditation (any and every form) has been scientifically proven, by countless respected institutions to significantly reduce stress and increase our capacity to cope with stress. Developing a meditation or intentional breathing practice should be a custom creation by you and you alone. Try on a few, experiment and then practice the ones that work best for you as consistently as you are able. Developing a 2 minute a day practice will still have a positive impact on your stress levels. If you are new to these concepts or even just interested on my perspective on this, check out a recent blog I wrote on Demystifying Meditation

Self-Care – The Art of the Home Spa Experience

Self-care is a huge part of not only my physical and emotional practices but also my spiritual practice. Nurturing and caring for oneself allows for a deeper and more intimate relationship with self, community and a deeper spiritual life.

When I am investing in myself it is as if I am putting deposits into the bank, think of these deposits not as money but as energy that can then be spent of the things you want such as deepening relationships, expanding career or achieving goals.

We cannot possibly show up and give successfully what our lives require of us unless we first have it to give away. If we simply give away all our energy from a depleted account that is when we lack excellence, balance and joy! It is also when we wear ourselves down and eventually break down.

Self-care needs to address our mental, physical, emotional and spiritual needs. Self-care can be anything that works for you or recharges you in a positive way.

I have created a self-care home spa experience that I incorporate into my self-care routine frequently (in whole or in part depending on the time I have set aside). Self-care does not have to be complex. In fact, most of mine is fairly basic yet highly effective. May this be helpful to you on your continued journey and exploration into the benefits of self-care!

Create Sacred Space

Start your home spa self-care experience by setting the tone or creating a sacred space. Turn the lights down, diffuse some lavender, light candles and play some beautiful relaxing music!

Breathe

Sit and close your eyes. Give yourself permission to put your ‘to do’ list away mentally and to let go of anything that you need to. Give yourself to feel whatever comes up. Spend a few minutes simply focusing on your breath. Breathe deep and relaxed breaths for a few minutes and just allow yourself to BE.

Detox Soak

Not only does a good detox soak in a tub reduce stress and tension mentally, physically and emotionally, it also helps to pull toxins out of your largest organ… your skin! Here is the detox recipe I use in my weekly baths, all of these ingredients can be found at WholeFoods or for more affordable option, on Amazon:

2 cups colloidal fine grain organic oatmeal

2 tablespoons of Coconut Charcoal

1 cup Apple Cider Vinegar

½ cup Arnica Oil

2 cups Magnesium Flakes

¼ cup Castor Oil

Draw a warm bath, stir in ingredients above. Feel free to add any essential oils you might enjoy as well such as lavender (for relaxation). Soak for at least 30 minutes.

Abhyanga (Self Massage)

You don’t have to set aside time and money to get a professional massage or miss out on the benefits if you either can’t afford one or simply don’t have time. Abhyanga is an Indian self-massage ritual that has many restorative and destressing perks in addition to the fast, accessible and in expensive aspects. All you need is a good clean (organic preferred) pure oil! The oils I recommend are Aragan, Almond or a good Ayurvedic oil blend. Generously apply oil starting from your feet and slowly massaging the oil in and working your way all the way up your body, even to your face and head! Rinse off after, but do not soap up. You will want some of the oils to be able to seep in throughout the day or overnight.

‘Details’

This is a time where I will give myself permission to pamper myself by paying attention to all the care and maintenance of the small ‘details’ such as putting on a face mask, giving myself a manicure or pedicure, plucking eyebrows, etc.

Stretch & Flow Restorative Yoga

Roll out your yoga mat or even a towel on the floor. Move your body through some light yoga stretches and restorative poses. If you don’t know any you can google some restorative yoga videos on YouTube or I highly recommend Cheri Clampett’s restorative yoga classes that are available on the Yoga Anytime Channel on Amazon. Whatever you choose, remember the goal is not to workout, the goal is to restore and nurture your body. So listen to your body, ask it what it needs and try to provide that. Your body may need to just stretch out and rest fully or spend a few minutes in one restorative pose. Either way, let go of expectations and let your body lead you.

Ritual

Finish up by creating a little ritual for yourself. A ritual can be anything as long as it has the following elements:

  1. Set an intention
  2. Invite in connection and guidance from a higher source (this can be God, nature, love, etc.)
  3. A sacred place/space (which you should have already created at the beginning of your self-care home spa practice)

Your ritual can be done through the use of artistic expression like painting or drawing, through burning incense, sage or Palo Santo wood, it can be done with crystals, with movement such as dance, it can be done communing in nature or anything else. Rituals should be personal and meaningful and breed connection with your higher true self and with God, Spirit, the Divine (or whatever is aligned with your beliefs).

 

 

People, Places & Career Post-Breakup Clearing

A post-break up guide for fully releasing relationships, career, old habits or patterns and experiencing true freedom.

The Breaking Up

Saying no to this means saying yes to something else.

Breaking up with a person, place, thing or situation usually comes from a struggling with a relationship and coming to a decision that it is no longer something you want in your life. You finally decide to say no to the relationship with the hopes of saying yes to something better.

We don’t only break up with people, we also break up with jobs, career paths, financial situations, places, food, habits, self-image and self-treatment and other non-serving patterns. When we do break up it is important to gain the much needed clarity on why we created or chose that relationship into our life, as well as clear the old relationship FULLY from our lives on all levels; mind, body, emotions, thoughts and spirit.

If you don’t gain the clarity and clearing you need more likely than not, you will draw in the same thing energetically again. This may come in different exterior wrapping. It may even be in a different category. For example, you break up with a lover only to draw in the same energy, pattern and cycle into your career.

If you want to be done with the relationship and free from it for good, here is a simple guide!

What Is a Relationship?

All relationships take time, energy, focus & intention.

A relationship is a connection and intimate interconnection that we create with many different things; people, food, places, habits, etc. In order to have a relationship with something or someone it takes time, energy, focus (attention) and intentionality (intentional thoughts & actions). We can’t be in a relationship with someone or something we are not investing our thoughts, our action (our time) or our energy in. Intentionality is ‘with purpose’ or having a higher purpose to the relationship. You may have been consciously aware of your purpose for a relationship or you may not have been consciously aware of it, but I promise you there was a higher purpose at play. The higher purpose is ‘the reason’ you got into the relationship. Whether that was to experience happiness, love, safety, security, stability, fun, health, comfort or a slew of many other potential higher purposes, be sure that there is one behind the relationship you are breaking up with.

THE HIGHER PURPOSE IS ALWAYS FOR YOUR GREATER GOOD!

Always, always and always! You may think that that abusive relationship or that horrible job or even that food binging issue is due to you being a failure, broken, weak or messed up. It’s not! It is simply feedback for you that the strategy you were running in order to achieve your higher purpose was not effective! So put the bat down and let’s move on to how to find an effective strategy.

Creating a new and effective strategy to achieving the higher purpose of what the relationship was created to fulfill begins with clarity and clearing!

Clarity

Clarity comes when we are empowered and gain clear understanding.

Until you get clear on the following things most people will simply recreate the same undesired relationship as they move forward:

  1. What is the higher purpose (what did you want the relationship to fulfill or add to your life)?
  2. Get clear on if your strategy for achieving that higher purpose was a positive strategy (meaning, did doing the things you did in that relationship and with the person, place or thing you were in the relationship with create or fulfill that higher purpose?)
  3. Come up with a new, better and more effective strategy to achieve the higher purpose

Clearing

Emotions, thoughts, habits & energy need to be cleared to fully release & move forward.

Let’s acknowledge for a moment that transition can be challenging. When we let go of something we may make a decision & remove ourselves from the thing or relationship but the energy of it may get stuck and linger causing negative emotions, lack of energy, confusion and worst of all attracting the same exact thing into our lives again.

So how can you clear a relationship?

Clearing needs to take place on all levels in order to be a full and complete clearing that will allow you the freedom to fully move forward and create something different. This means clearing physically, emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually & energetically. Below are some simple tips on how to do this.

Emotional Clearing

Emotional clearing consists of clearing negative emotions, attachments to negative emotions both with the person or people, places, things or situations that are attached or associated to the break up (the relationship itself, people and things attached to the relationship, etc.). Emotional clearing also includes clearing the emotions about yourself that have to do with the situation or person you are breaking up with, the break up itself.

Here are a few steps to emotional clearing:

  1. Acknowledge It

People spend so much time and energy avoiding or suppressing their emotions. This only causes the emotions to become buried and stuck. Make no mistake, stuck emotions create illness and problems in all aspects of life. We are designed to experience emotions; it is part of being a human being. So acknowledge how you are truly feeling. Honor those emotions versus avoiding them. This will ready you to process them and release them. Use a journal or a trustworthy and non-judgmental friend as a sounding board.

  1. Process It

Processing your emotions means intentionally creating the time and space to feel them. Meditate and allow them to rise up to the surface and flow freely. Don’t try to stop your emotions, try to be with them.

  1. Release It

Just rolling around in negative emotions is not healthy and will actually magnify the emotions. It is important to get them up and out of the body and your entire being. You can do this through movement, exercise, creativity and sharing them in a safe way with a safe person.

Mental Clearing

Mental clearing consists of shifting your thought patterns about yourself, the thing your breaking up with and any situations attached to the person or thing you are breaking up with and also any projected thoughts (these are future based that have not happened yet, these are negative thoughts about the future).

Here are a few steps to mental clearing:

  1. Awareness

Become aware of your thought life and thought patterns. Many people let their thoughts drive their emotions and actions unintentionally. This causes people to go wherever their thoughts lead them. You are in control of your mind and therefor can clear your thought patterns and create new healthy thought patterns. Try starting a ‘thought journal’. This will help you track and become aware of your thought life and thought patterns.

  1. Intentionality

Start to intentionally invest in your thought life, choose where and how you spend your thoughts. This doesn’t mean not ever having negative thoughts, but it does mean that when you do have them you don’t allow yourself to get swept away with them and end up running around and around with them. Make good thought choices one thought at a time.

  1. Build a Relationship (with your thought patterns)

Any good relationship takes love, time, attention and focus. Begin a relationship with your thoughts and build a healthy and higher serving thought life. Invest some time in thinking on and about the things that serve you such as dreaming, vision casting and the things you want to experience and create such as a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

Physical Clearing

Physical clearing clears the body and the physical world around you of the old relationship.

When people think of the physical aspects of themselves they mostly think of their bodies. But the physical aspects also include your physical world, the things that you have or do not have around you and the things that you tangibly create.

Here are a few steps to physical clearing:

  1. Spring Cleaning

Out with the old, in with the new. Let go of anything in your physical world that no longer serves you. Look around you and notice what is within your physical body or surrounding you in your physical world. If those things are attached to the old relationship or do not bring you joy, let them go! That means un-invite them from your life and get rid of them!

  1. Physical Care

Slow down and take good and gentle care of yourself physically as well as all of the physical things around you. This is a time to nurture yourself and the physical things in your life, so give yourself permission to up your self-care game.

  1. Time & space

Allow time for the residue to wear off. Give yourself permission to just be for a bit. Don’t jump into another relationship. Don’t jump into a fad diet, hardcore nutrition or fitness plan, take on a new lover or love interest, job or career. Just be here now for a little while. Once you have fully cleared and given yourself this time and space you will be free to create more balanced things through effective and loving actions.

Spiritual Clearing

Spiritual clearing consists of deepening your connection with yourself, community, the world (the earth) and the higher source you believe in. It also consists of getting re-aligned with your true and higher self.

Here are a few steps to spiritual clearing:

  1. Connect with yourself

Be with yourself. Create the time and space to connect with yourself in a true, meaningful and intimate way. Do this in a way that works for you and helps you feel connected. This may take some trial and error, so experiment and see what works best for you. This can be as simple as focusing on your breath and closing your eyes, meditating, doing yoga or journaling.

  1. Connect with the world

Be with the world, with the earth, with nature. Create the time and space to connect with the world around you in a true, meaningful and intimate way. Do this in a way that works for you and helps you feel connected. This also may take some trial and error, so experiment and see what works best for you. It can be as simple as taking a walk in nature, noticing and enjoying a beautiful surrounding or volunteering to clean up a park or finding a way to reduce your footprint.

  1. Connect with community

Be with community. Create the time and space to connect with people round you and create or participate in community in a true, meaningful and intimate way. Do this in a way that works for you and helps you feel connected. Again, this also may take some trial and error, so experiment and see what works best for you. It can be as simple as taking a yoga class, sitting at an outdoor café and striking up conversations, hosting a potluck dinner, connecting with friends or family or partaking in a community form of spirituality or spiritual worship expression.

  1. Connect with Source

Be with your God. Create the time and space to connect with Source, God, Higher Power or whatever your beliefs connect you with. This can even be connecting with the feeling and expression of love. Make sure you do this in a meaningful and intimate way, one that feels right for you. Connection to beliefs without true alignment, authentic worship or expression is dead and creates no spiritual clearing or growth, it is simply posturing. So do this in a way that works for you and helps you feel connected versus what you think you ‘should’ do. This also may take some trial and error, so experiment and see what works best for you. It can be as simple as praying, meditating on love, participating in a community worship experience or even sitting down and just talking and connecting with God.

Energetic Clearing

Energetic clearing occurs when we are able to change the frequency of our personal energy as well as unclog and release the old energy.

Once we have energetically cleared the old relationship, we no longer are ‘playing the tune’ of the old relationship and the things attached to that. It means that we are now operating or putting out a different frequency. This also means you will create and attract different things. You will now attract and create relationships based on your new frequency.

Here are a few steps to energetic clearing:

  1. Become aware of your energy

Our energy has subtle and not so subtle feelings and shifts. Begin bringing your awareness to meet these and notice your energy and personal frequency. Are you amped up, feeling unable to sit and be, calm, peaceful, angry… these may be words to describe emotions however energy is not easily definable. Energy is something that is. It exists in and around you. Energy can be connected with and experienced with more awareness. Invest in becoming aware of your personal energy. Experiment and see what works for you.

  1. Set an intention

There’s a great saying ‘where intention (or conscious focus) goes, energy flows’. Set an intention and begin to feel how your energy shifts as you hold this intention throughout the space of a week or so.

  1. Create a ritual

There are thousands of energy clearing rituals and the ones that work are the ones that create a ritual or ceremony that feels right for you. This could be sagging, getting energy work done, self-clearing energy work, Reiki, one of my or another practitioners guided visualizations or any other sacred ritual. The important thing is to create and practice that ritual with the intention of connecting with your higher self and Source or God along with the intention of clearing your personal energy of anything that doesn’t serve you or may be stuck within your energetic field. Again, there are thousands of ways to do this; you should pick one that you feel comfortable and safe trying. You can be as ‘normal’ and grounded or as creatively ‘out there’ as you desire, so make your energy clearing ritual personalized to you.

Human beings are strong and resilient. We are all able to shift, re-build, re-invent and transform our lives. Even when difficulties arise we are able to learn, heal and grow. Remember, that even during this transition, you are whole and resourceful! You need only to return to this wholeness through balanced intentional steps, self-love and self-care!

May you clear what needs to be cleared so that you may create that which serves you more!

In Wholeness,

Rachel

Copyright Dr. Rachel Dew 2019-2021. All Rights Reserved